Sunday, April 8, 2012

FSF: Tears


Another 5 Sentence Fiction!

Don't know what I mean by that?
for details.


Tears

     I stood over the tiny coffin, fingers knotted through a small linen dress - worn only once - and tried to ignore the well-meaning neighbor speaking platitudes in my grief-deadened ears. 
     Why won't she go away? 
     I had held it in for as long as I could - for my husband, my mother, for my little Wills, who couldn't understand why "sissy" had to "go away." I wanted to go away - follow my Katie through the Veil and care for her there, if I wasn't allowed to do so here. This nightmarish Duchess from Wonder-less-land, with all her useless morals, needed to go away before I lost it here, where everyone could see.

Wow. This isn't exactly traditional Easter fare, is it?
Somehow that's just where the writing prompt took me.
Thoughts? Opinions? Let me know in the comments!

Thanks for reading!


(and Happy Easter!)

12 comments:

  1. Well, that kind of rips a person's guts out through her nostrils, doesn't it? So, so sad. And powerful.

    Well done, Angela! Now I'm just going to go sit in the corner and cry for a while. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Um...I'm sorry...thank you...sorry? It was a rather rough snapshot, wasn't it? :(

      Thanks for reading!

      Delete
  2. Angela, this is heartbreaking. You've used small words and short thoughts to create a most powerful story. I am really moved.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! I don't know why this was the image that came to me; I delayed writing my five sentences for several days because I wanted something more cheerful (seeing as how it was Easter and all), but this one would not let me alone.

      Delete
  3. Such a sad story so beautifully written. I think the last two lines are perfect!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And thank you for hosting such a wonderful creative challenge each week!

      Delete
  4. I also loved the last two lines, so poignant and torn apart...very moving.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! And thanks for reading!

      Delete
  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  6. That last sentence... ahhhh. I'm going to go get in the shower and have a nice cry. :P

    seriously though, this is so beautiful... These things don't usually suck me in like that one did. Great job :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Oh my gosh, what a very sad piece. . .beautifully written and capturing the huge sense of loss that no one else understands. Well done. xx

    ReplyDelete